bunhead for life

20. gemini.

Surrender // let go

And so we broke up – my ultimate fear. Timing is just not on our side, in fact the distance, the time zone, my insecurities including our busy uni lives. Everything seems to be against us.

But we surrender.

To me, surrender is the word that I actually want to get it tatt on my arm or wrist.

Surrender – in life, we aren’t in control of everything. And sometimes you just have to let go.

lazy sundays

20 Things Everyone Should Learn By The Time They Turn 20

Thought Catalog

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Now that I can officially say that I’ve been putzing around Earth for a grand total of 20 years, I think it’s time to share a few nuggets of wisdom I’ve been exposed to within my first days of no longer being cursed by teenager-dom.

1. No one else can make you happy.

This is one thing everyone always tells you and that you know you should understand, but never quite believe until it hits you over the head with a baseball bat. Friends, family and significant others are all amazing people to have in your life and while they will probably smile and rub your back while you vent about your problems, no one can completely solve them except you.

2. Material things break.

Obviously. That favorite ceramic mug one of your best friends gave you a couple birthdays ago, the same one you dropped and shattered the other day, won’t…

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100th

just some random things that i find pretty. *yawnssss* gonna head to bed now.

livin’ life without him by my side

And so, he just left for UK last night.

Things are pretty okay I guess. So far so good. Well, there are a few things that will always flash across my mind at least once a day :

1. he must be busy.

2. we can make it through.

3. no we won’t make it through. 4 years is just too long.

4. nah, we can make it through if only you don’t overthink.

5. keep yourself busy as hell.

6. tired? sleep.

7. if it’s meant to be, it’ll be. don’t stress about anything that you’re unsure of, God will reveal them to you in time.

8. good things take time

9. nothing ever comes easy if it’s something good

// greatest risk; greatest reward //

My boyfriend is by far the greatest risk I’ve ever taken, and the greatest reward God has ever given to me. 

One day my boyfriend came in with a great news – getting offered by the university of leeds. And yes, my first reaction wasn’t the “oh-i’m-so-proud-of-you” kinda face but the “har” face. 

I cried in the cinema secretly. I cried at night. I cried in the shower. I cried in my bedroom. I cried in the car. 

I totally did not see this coming. Not at all. I just, cry all the time. I am even crying now as I am typing this. 

I love him, God I just love him so so much. I’m never letting him go unless our relationship has become toxic or unhealthy. 

gosh choosing a nice quote for my twitter acc is tough. and mentally draining at the same time.

light of my life, fire of my loins

Long kisses are pretty captivating. Especially the ones where your tongues intertwining, sliding back and forth in his mouth, tasting every inch of his smooth tongue. 

He got drunk for the first time ever, and the moment he laid his lips on mine, he inserted his tongue into mine. Tagging on my tongue, I felt slightly disgusted as our friends were looking. But it felt magnetic, wanting for more. 

I now need to(was forced to, i had no choice but to) wear a pair of spectacles whenever I am in class slash using the lappy slash studying slash watching a movie in the pitch black cinema. Simply because my astig has gone up to 75-50, short sightedness up to 25-25. Yeah, ‘that’ severe to wear specs. 

I have always wanted to wear specs throughout my childhood. I remember vaguely that I was so eager to wear a pair I actually went for eye checks so frequently just to see if my eyesight has deteriorate. But not until I got into secondary school I became so freaking self conscious about myself I just didn’t want to wear them.(you can tell how much I grew up in high school, so yeah)

Right when I thought I was okay, BOOM.

“Miss, you need a pair of specs.”

“Oh, um, err, are you sur- okay then.” I gulped awkwardly.